It is not easy living as a codependent if you don't realize there is a problem. Some folk with these issues are codependent love addicts which makes it even more difficult. Once someone does realize that there is a problem, they will be able to find a psychologist who can help them with their disorder. However, one does need to be patient because it does take time.
Someone who is codependent will struggle with control, and this involves controlling others in a relationships as well as being controlled by others. This can make one comfortable having that sense of responsibility. However, one also begins to be resentful and blame comes into play because of the boundaries that they have trouble controlling.
Most of this comes back to situations in their childhood which was not healthy. There was often neglect and abandonment involved. This causes one to be fearful of being rejected in certain relationships. They are fearful of being intimate because of the fact that they might at anytime be neglected by their partner. It makes the relationship unhealthy.
When they are not with someone, they will go into withdrawal mode. They become lonely and depressed. There are people who are more severely affected than others and they will battle with that empty feeling a lot of the time. They may even feel suicidal at time because of this addiction that they face. When they are in a relationship, they feel as though they are on a high. If they don't have this, they may want to be comforted with drugs or food.
A lot of time is spent on these relationships, thinking obsessively about the partner or about future relationships. One will often do everything for the partner and it is never an equal based relationship which is not healthy. This kind of person needs to be taken care of, but it is very often unrealistic. Of course, this goes back to the childhood when parents or caregivers were not interested in the children and this made them feel unloved. This is the price theat they have to pay.
Someone who is a love addict as well will try and blend in, but that fear will always be there. They will be afraid of the intimacy, but will also fear abandonment. Below they will be struggling, but this does not show on the outside. They appear to be just like anyone else and able to function like any other human being. This is more like an obsessive compulsive sort of behaviour.
They may say that they are doing fine, but deep down inside this would be painful for them. They could be jealous when seeing a partner with others in their life. They would also experience a great deal of shame and pain. They would be feeling trapped at this stage in their life and it would be difficult to know where to turn.
A love addict will battle with self care as they focus more and more on obsessive thoughts of fantasizing and various relationships. In severe cases, they will continue to return to previous relationships and become abusive. The will probably only see things in their partner in a negative light. Their behavior will become offensive and obscure.
Someone who is codependent will struggle with control, and this involves controlling others in a relationships as well as being controlled by others. This can make one comfortable having that sense of responsibility. However, one also begins to be resentful and blame comes into play because of the boundaries that they have trouble controlling.
Most of this comes back to situations in their childhood which was not healthy. There was often neglect and abandonment involved. This causes one to be fearful of being rejected in certain relationships. They are fearful of being intimate because of the fact that they might at anytime be neglected by their partner. It makes the relationship unhealthy.
When they are not with someone, they will go into withdrawal mode. They become lonely and depressed. There are people who are more severely affected than others and they will battle with that empty feeling a lot of the time. They may even feel suicidal at time because of this addiction that they face. When they are in a relationship, they feel as though they are on a high. If they don't have this, they may want to be comforted with drugs or food.
A lot of time is spent on these relationships, thinking obsessively about the partner or about future relationships. One will often do everything for the partner and it is never an equal based relationship which is not healthy. This kind of person needs to be taken care of, but it is very often unrealistic. Of course, this goes back to the childhood when parents or caregivers were not interested in the children and this made them feel unloved. This is the price theat they have to pay.
Someone who is a love addict as well will try and blend in, but that fear will always be there. They will be afraid of the intimacy, but will also fear abandonment. Below they will be struggling, but this does not show on the outside. They appear to be just like anyone else and able to function like any other human being. This is more like an obsessive compulsive sort of behaviour.
They may say that they are doing fine, but deep down inside this would be painful for them. They could be jealous when seeing a partner with others in their life. They would also experience a great deal of shame and pain. They would be feeling trapped at this stage in their life and it would be difficult to know where to turn.
A love addict will battle with self care as they focus more and more on obsessive thoughts of fantasizing and various relationships. In severe cases, they will continue to return to previous relationships and become abusive. The will probably only see things in their partner in a negative light. Their behavior will become offensive and obscure.
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